[CAREER NEWS] Accepting what is

Apr 01, 2020

In an unprecedented crisis like this, we become aware that a microscopic, invisible and elusive enemy is capable of bringing nearly the whole world to a standstill...

Many of us are gripped by a feeling of helplessness. We will have to call on all our reserves to, firstly, accept what is, and, secondly, find a way of living through this transition period as best we can. In other words, we will have to think about possible scenarios to emerge from the crisis while at the same time get the most out of the positive lessons that can be learned from this experience…

What do we mean by "accepting what is" and how do we reach that point?

Often, our first reflex in thinking about how to "accept what is" is to remain passive in the face of events or even resigned to them... and yet that is not the case nor does that mean we are happy with the way things are.

Accepting what is means facing up to reality: it means stopping looking for the "why" and moving towards the "how" by preparing to explore new avenues and find new solutions.

What is reality? Alfred Korzybski puts it this way: "The map is not the territory" (one of the basic presuppositions of NLP). In fact, everyone has their own way of representing reality or their circumstances. Indeed, each of us lives and reacts to events through our own system of representation and/or our five senses (sight, hearing, touch, smell, taste).

It is our mind map of reality that shapes our personality, our behaviour and gives meaning to our actions. It is therefore generally not the experience that limits us or gives us confidence, but the perception of it, that is to say the meaning we attach to that experience...

In the end, whether we like it or not and whether consciously or unconsciously, in these complex times we are obliged to reconsider our reality from another angle. In fact, we are doing it already - with teleworking, for example, we are committed to making the best of the situation and we continue to live in hope and keep moving forward when the outcome of the crisis still seems some way off...

In short, "accepting what is" is also mourning what used to be, what could have been and what should have been in order to experience the reality of the present moment as fully as possible.

How to move towards peace of mind?

Acknowledge your sorrow, your pain, your regrets, your remorse etc. in the present moment - if they are there, they are there for a reason but don’t immediately try to find out what that is. Acknowledge that they are there and what they are without judgement…

Free yourself from them by talking about them, confiding in someone, writing it down, drawing, painting, or singing in such a way as to externalise them, while transcending the pain that goes with them...

Then, look at them from a different perspective, think of them as a raw material with which you can build something new that belongs to you. In other words, do what an oyster would do, which is gradually transforming a grain of sand into a magnificent pearl…

Finally, have faith in yourself... trust your ability to find the strengths inside you to face what is coming.

This change in emotional experience (because that's what this is all about!) is a road to personal growth and the attainment of inner peace that everyone will follow at their own pace.

You can choose to be accompanied along this road by a coach. Elizabeth Toucas, Career Manager & Executive Strengths Coach at IÉSEG Network, can help you. To get in touch with her, contact: e.toucas@ieseg.fr
 
In his book New Earth: The Advent of Human Consciousness, Eckhart Tolle wrote:
One thing we do know: life will give you whatever experience is most useful for the evolution of your consciousness. And how do you know this is the experience you need? Because this is the experience you are having at the moment…"
 


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